random things about today…

…i woke up at 0400 and looked around my room, but couldn’t find buggs anywhere. his bed was upside down on the floor and he wasn’t in it. i couldn’t understand, because he sleeps in his bed, down at the foot of my bed…with me. i was worried and confused. i thought that perhaps he had been “dognapped.” i called his name several times…no buggs!! the last time that i called him, rather frantically. i saw my pile of dirty clothes (headed for the laundry) move. i saw two little glowing eyes. buggs was sleeping and hiding under my dirty laundry and his bed was upside down on the floor. whatever happened, he’s keeping it a secret from me…

…when i got up at 0700 to start my day…i was angry for some strange reason. i think that after waking up to find buggs hiding and sleeping under my dirty laundry…i had a series of bad dreams involving buggs, a canister of rolled oats, my roommates, and my car’s key fob. i don’t remember any specifics…

…the sky was black and it actually rained for nine minutes. i timed it. it was nice. i miss it so fucking much…everything associated with it. it smelled so good for those nine minutes. it was a gift from the universe to me or at least i am choosing to think so…

…there were accidents both on my way to an ultrasound and coming from the ultrasound in rough the same stretch of freeway, on the opposite side. both accidents required traffic to crawl along at twenty miles per hour. both accidents involved white trucks…

…i spent most of my time today either in a doctor’s office, imaging center, lab, or my car. i didn’t have time to write the posts that i was going to write or to post anything. so instead, i used my time to reflect on some of my accomplishments from over the last year. a very, sage woman suggested that i do this and i felt gratitude for being able to accomplish so much, as a result of improved health and strength…which ironically enough was prompted and encouraged, by said woman. i needed to take that little “time out” today and truly feel blessed for whom and what i have in my life…

…i watched and took photos of a drunk woman as she hit a police officer several times, spit on him, and yelled horrible taunts at him. i don’t know if she was truly out of her mind or trying to bait him into using excessive force or what, but what i witnessed was a very patient, male officer. he went out of his way to call a female officer to get the lady into cuffs and pat her down. it made me happy to see something other than what i see and hear about on the news…

…i’m exhausted…physically, mentally, and emotionally, but tomorrow is a new day and tomorrow i am going to take some more of that sage advice. actually, not just tomorrow, but everyday. i will visualize what i want. i will say it out loud. and, i will write about it! so, i’m excited, because i for the most part know what i want and don’t want for myself. i guess that i will call accomplishing my goals, phase three. i will be working phases two and three concurrently and i will be writing about these wants and goals…

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